8:06 AM
yeays...today is the last afternoon shift for the week...and then will be doing morning and on friday going back to ITE campus for simulation training AGAIN...been doing afternoon shift the past 2 days and it was kinda stagnant with nothing muchie to do except for admission and more admission...seriously i think now i am a pro in doing the orienteering for admission which includes having to provide the pain and handwashing education...how great can that be..makes me feel that i have past out as an enrolled nurse already...hmm but am i ready for that..nyeah actually i am not because my brain and mind have been brainwashed by the hubby and family to continue in diploma after graduation...insya'allah i will if GOD permits....
hmm...the precious are moving gracefully in the water...so free and happily..hehe and i have already given their fair share of the pallets...will give another meal before i head off to work later...
anyways been having backache and back pain these few days and weeks...guess it could be probably due to having to start attachie and improper lifting technique....well but its also getting better with enough rest...hehe...well nothing much happen yesterday...as per usual parameters and more parameters especially 1hourly parameters for those patients who are POST-OP...
have i ever say that i really liked nursing...like spoosh why am i even mentioning it only now...hahas guess the mind going bonkers as well...
oh yesh saw yaty while i was leaving the hospital premises yesterday...hehe having to bump into one of the JERRIES makes me recall all those happy moments...now i am missing all D'TJs especially the JERRIES...haiya wonder when we can meetie up...the schdule of our shift always will be the opposite of the other...especially mine...hehe but no worries man we will meetie up for sure cause we will need to survey and shop for prom nite outfits...haha...
anyway been exactly 3 days since i last talked from the hubby and the missingness is getting the best of me or NOT...funny thing yesterday after i got back from work and finishing shower, decided not to turn in first but went ahead to watch CSI:MIAMI and cold case...and as i was watching these shows, i was also thinking and missing the hubby...and outta nowhere i received aMESSAGE from the hubby and i was super shocked...hehe but it kinda dapat lepaskan rindu jugak walaupun setakat bace mesej je...
to the hubby...having to end off the bloggie each time with alil message for you is like a routine for me but to me its not ahassle but its my way of saying that i am thinking and waiting right here for you till you are back for GOOD and i mean for GOOD...not going back to that place again..am missing you always....lovie lovie you lots lots...huggss...muackiez...
p.s:didnt see the message coming yesterday...love you lots!!
the apple of my eyes...king of my heart..
the JERRIES...mishy you mousy lots
8:26 AM
well here i am again blogging in for today..and i have better bloggie in very quickly before the internet or computer hang and shuts down on me..haish it can be very infuriating especially if have bloggie in like tonnes of words...hehe...
niwae just woken up like an hour ago and have already finished feeding the two precious and am still looking and gazing at them while i am at the computer...by the way did i mention that the two precious is being kept in my room..hehe...am blogging in and thinking about the hubby at this very moment..haish...well one thing for sure its no use of me sighing and all...but what i can do is to just occupy myself with things to make me busy and then will the time move faster...
yesterday was posted to the new ward 55A...its the ENT and Gynae side...well aint so bad except that time moves very slowly there cause there no bladder washout or any catheter drainage unlike 55B...kinda miss that ward....had lotsa fun there mann...UROLOGY rock on...hmm anyway first day at the new ward and i have got 2 initials signed...one was neurovascular assessment which i spot on during the report taking while the other was monitoring elderly on restrainer...hmm thank god that i have managed to get quite anumber of skills signed for competency and initial...but one thing that i am bersyukur is that i am left with only 1 critical skill to be signed for competency...urhhm probably i will get it signed during the ortho posting...that is if it still is planned as scheduled for ortho posting...
and yar the only thing that was happening at ward 55A yesterday was that all the Directors of Nursing from all the Singhealth clusters was down at SGH to visit the DON of SGH who is admitted and the best thing is that no students are allowed to attend to her cause for fear we students make any mistakes and that will put abad name to ward 55A...haish politics and hypocrisy...thats what i would say of the situations...hehe...the funny thing i heard from the talks of the sisters is that she got admitted for having sore throat and that for losing her voice....how funny...hahas...but what the heck...aint my business actually cause i am not the student in charge of room 1..the VIP room...
yesterday during break i thought that i would disturb the hubby by sending him a message that needed him to actually call me if he wants me all his life...well sadly at first i didnt receive any call and i had to report back for duty...but hehe i was surprised when i received a voice message from hubby saying that he loves me...awww seriously didnt expect him to reply cause niat di hati nak mengusik sahaje...cause i dont need any foolish message to know if hubby loves me cause both of us loved each other so much...and hubby always assures me and always remind me not to think negative but always think positive instead...tell you what i can be very negative at time...but that used to lah now nomore and its all thanks to my hubby....hehe
to my dearest hubby...am thinking and missing you lots...but its ouhkays i will endure these next months with patience and cant wait for you to be back in my arms once again... and that i am right here waiting for you till you are back in my arms once again..lovie lovie you lots lots...huggss..muackiez...
i need you in my life...i want you in my life not only now but forever...thinking of you always and missing you lots...
9:44 AM
hahas...i never thought these two goldfishes would actually fill my life with colours when the hubby first bought it for me...i was like in my mind, hubby could have bought me something else to make me remind me of hubby whenever i misses him...but now i am like really stuck to these two precious of mine...it would be them that i look to when i first wake up in the morning...it really have a sentimental values to me...feeding it...talking to it...changing the water tank..i dont and never will find it a hassle doing it but infact i enjoyed doing it...you can say its reverse therapy also lah...by having the two precious around, at least i dont feel so empty in me cause its something that hubby left for me just before he went off to being 1138km away from me again...
anyways the weekend really passed by very quickly without me knowing it...hmm later have got to get ready for attachie...come to think of it 2 weeks have passed and now is already into the 3rd week of attachie and how time flys..but to me it will always be slow because the hubby is not here with me...haish... hehe...yesterday went to meetie up with hubby's mum to transfer the 100 bucks over to his friend account for his usage this week before he gets his pay like next week..seriously i have got to thank hubby for sacrificing alot of his cash on B-tone card just to call me and yesterday itself hubby already spent 30 bucks on B-tone cause he misses me so much so that he really needed and wanted to hear my voice...if you guys wanna know i too misses him as much as hubby misses me..hehe..so yesterday i kinda talked hubby to sleep...aint that cute... well my dearest hubby will always and forever be cute in my eyes..
hmm...now that i have bloggie in what i have wanted to..what shall i bring to work to eat today....urhm sandwiches or biscuits...any opinion anyone??....well looks like i better get my food pack ready and head off to the shower cause gotta run some errands at the town council for my mother...
to my one and only hubby..just wanna you to know that you are the only DEAR in my heart...and like i always say..you are the king of my heart...the apple of my eyes...the nut to this little squirrel...hehe...and that i will always be right here waiting...thinking..missing you always...i will treasure you more than i treasure my life..i will chose to love you when other chose to hate you and my love for you will keep you away from harms..insya'allah...and that you are the light in my life...the sun that shine on me..lovie lovie you lots lots...huggss...muackiez...
9:46 AM
guess whud...i was like blogging in whole lot of things when suddely the computer shut down on me just like that and now i am just too pissed to bloggie in already...hmm maybe i shall bloggie in when i return from work tonight..that is if i am not too tired to do so....well now have gotta get my lunch pack ready...wonder what sandwich i shall make for myself today...been having cucumber sandwich the past few days or would i say aweek...heheanyways hope that work today will be great and as busy as yesterday though i am pissed bout yesterday...haish...no comment bout that cause i tried to bloggie it in but dang the comp chose to ruin it...to my dear...just want you to know that i am thinking and missing you lots...its really a torment not having to hear from you but i shall 'ren' or endure it till the very end of your overseas attachment...anyways lovie lovie you lots lots...cant wait fro your final return and to give you awhole lot of hugs and kisses...huggss...muackiez...
5:19 AM
the torment of missing someone i loved most is way painful than having to have my first tooth extracted when i was in Primary 1..hehe but insya'allah all these being faraway is for a good and worthwhile cause...this test our, that is me and hubby...patience which is very important in every relationship..i also do not want the hubby to turn into the 'HULK' again like the other time..for me once is enough to get by as a lesson learnt..anyway yesterday i kinda slept early cause was super tired at work yesterday..work was as usual..doing the basic nursing care but to my surprise i have completed quite a number of skills..hmm well done zawani but there is still more to go....by the way saw one of the JERRIES at work yesterday...yaty to be precise..hmm wonder biler lagiks boleh terserempak ngan uh'een...hehe...oh yesh the colleagues at work have been getting lesser and lesser with Gaya having to be admitted in NUH and Kak Lelah still on hospitalisation leave...haish our health and mind can be very unpredictable...never know when you are going to be sick..who knows might be i will be hospitalised next...ish insya'allah tak..seliseh...hehe..should get my breakfast ready for work..but not forgetting, i was super surprised when hubby called me at home despite what had happen..that seriously touched my heart..like dear said, when you misses someone you would go to all extreme just to hear them...thanchew dear for being so understanding to my needs...to my dearest hubby...no matter how long you are away, just bear in mind that i am thinking and mssing you always...that you are on my mind 24/7 and 365 days..hehe...but kalau possible please make the months pass by fast....you takie cares of yourself...will always be waiting for you ...lovie lovie you lots lots...hugggs...muackiez...
5:27 AM
morning2 to all the peeps..anyway am getting ready for work but decided to blog in alil...hehe anyways yesterday was fine for me except that i was allocated to the HIGH DEPENDACY unit which i handled alone as the junior there...basically i was like a real enrolled nurse doing her job...cedebah...well dream on zawani you have got like amonth or so before graduating..and that also have yet to confirm if i am going to work or poly... 
anyways the truth i bloggie in early is because i am missing my dearie whose is 1138km away from me again..anyways he is the love of my heart..apple of my eye...king of my heart..hehe ok ok shant get all mushy up...
guess i should end off here cause gotta set off to work..
to my dearie hubby..am thinking and missing you lots..you dont worry kays, you will always be on my mind every minute, every second and through all the moments that i am still breathing..lovie lovie you lots lots...huggss...muackiez...
7:00 PM
arrrghhh...how dumb can the lil sis be..she left the comp on just like that and when i was about to use it, the whole comp HANG on me...*hiak dush*...anyways, my butt is all sore from all the sitting and watching the tv with nothing to do but lucky thing for me i still have my precious fishes that the hubby bought for me just before he went back to being 1138km away from me..my days are just filled with watching and talking to the fishes...it just feel like i am expressing how i feel to the hubby...and i just hope that the fishes will be able to stay by my side till God knows when...cant imagine how life's going to be for me should these fishes dont live long...haish..but i am going to do all my best to ensure that their life span will be longer..anyways D'TJs have been keeping quiet...hmm i wonder just how they are doing...well i guess they are busy with attachie and their boyfies..how i envy them for having their loved ones around them..while as for me all alone here..the source of strength is nowhere near me...and i seriously need the strength for me to persevere...insya'allah i will find it deep within me..having to miss my hubby so much, i now realise that missing my buddies are not just missing them but i feel that they are also part of me just like how hubby is...but sorry guys...more will be for the hubby..hehe..hubby...i am seriously missing you lots as i am even blogging in my entry..no amount of words could actually expresses how i am missing you..the pain is within me though i told you that i am ouhkay and will be able to survive for the next 6 months...the truth is that i cant but for our and your sake, i am finding the strength to do so...and i am pretty sure i will able to do it...that is with you always on my mind...to my dearest hubby..though i wont hear from you often, i just want you to know that i am thinking and waiting while missing you always...hehe...and most importantly i will always and keep loving you dear...lovie you lots lots..huggsss..muackiez...
5:38 PM
hahas...yeahs its wanie back in the house again..and i think its been aweek or so since i last bloggie in...hehe and i guess D'TJs knows what is the reason that stops me from bloggging in..yeshie..the hubby was back in town for aweek last week..and he like went back last wednesday...and to my own surprise i actually cried non-stop in the train when i saw hubby walking away..the pain was so much to bear that i told hubby how he didnt have to go back...but haish like hubby say that all this has happen and he cant turn back time and all i can do is pray and pray that the next 6 months will pass by unknowingly..oh yesh..by the way i would like to thank my best buds that had helped me in making the surprise birthday party worked out and once again to all for making the effort and taking that opportunity for our gathering...and i really enjoyed myself that day...13/01/2007...and the pictures i will upload and email it aites..sorry eh taking along time to do it...anyways..been missing the buds...but hehe i saw uh'een yesterday in the train..well she looked kinda sleepy to me..just like me..but hey though we only like chatted for awhile, i still feel great having to see her..should meetie up hor one of these days after attachie or before you start WORKING..hehe...and heres an advice from me..dont even think of changing your career..we have slogged hard to do well in nursing...and if it wasnt for nursing,i wouldnt have met up with awhole bunch of best friends....anyways in here i wana share a good news to all my peeps reading this...firstly, my hubby's dad having finally accepted me...and in a way he has even start talking to me whenever i at hubby's house and it made me feel like one of them...ahh, aint that blissful...mendapat restu daripada kedua2 pihak keluarga is very important and the most BIG news that came as a shock to me was that...hubby said that his dad says that most probably end of next year we might be getting engaged..insya'allah...hubby's dad was like saying to hubby that...tak baik bawak anak dara orang manis2 keluar tanpa ikatan...hehe dengar tu dear..hehehe...well i guess that should be all...will bloggie again when i am free but no wories i wont let this bloggie go abandon like it did the other time i went for attachie..taliking about attachie, ward 55B is a nice ward to work in except that its VERY stagnant..hehe.. how irony can that be..to my dearest friends..i hope that though we are going to graduate soon and now is busy with attcahie, i really do hope that we will keep in touch aites..anything just beep me at my mobile or call me at home..really missing you guys but miss someone more lah..not forgetting him also...heheto my one and only hubby...though this time you will be gone for 6 months, just wanna let you know that things will never change abit except that i will still continue loving you more and more as days goes by...and have faith in us and in me that i will wait for your return like i always do and have been doing..though we are having problems in communicating with each other this time around, i want you to know that it will never stop me and it will never be a barrier to stop loving you...you are always on my mind 24/7..just like how i am in your mind 24/7...the note you wrote in my diary will be my inspiration and motivation..am thinking and missing you lots...loving you lots lots..the days that i spent with you last week will always be in my mind and that its always on my mind..i need you in my life...i want you in my life...you have to be in my life...i want a future in US...takie cares..lovie you..huggss...muackiez...1138km apart......
8:31 PM
merry go round the stars..merry go round the moon..merry go round the chimney top on a sunny afternoon...hahas..i guess i must be crazy singing a nursery rhyme for no reason...haish..do you peeps realise that the first week of the year 2007 is moving SUPER slowy and i mean the clock is ticking slowly..hmm, probably i guess it just me waiting for the hubby to be back and that is precisely why i think everything is moving at a slower pace...well anyway tomorrow will meeting up with yaty and uh'eens...yeays...going to shop for the project thingy and ehem ehem...hehe..cant wait to meetie up with these two crazy yet funny buddies of mine...anyway..i was prepared not to hear anything from hubby for the 3rd day..not forgetting the fact that he didnt wish me aidiladha or new year..hehe...but all that was forgiven when i finally gotten a call from hubby...hooray,hooray..that was what my heart was saying in silence..anyway, the mobile phone that i passed to his fren has already safely arrived and also the 40 bucks...hehe..finally hubby has his own phone to call me when hubby is in brunei...thanks to Ikhsan that has been lending hubby his phone to make personal call...thanchew berrie muchie...to my dearest hubby..today really had awonderful talk with you over the phone and we really talked alot...about the past, present and also the future..frankly speaking dear i am looking-forward to spend my life with you in the future and i am waiting slowly for the day to come..but for now, i am waiting and thinking and missing you lots...cepatlah balik eh!!...lovie lovie you lots lots...muackiez..huggss...
12:16 PM
hahas..a very good morning to all the peeps out there....
a belated hari raya aidiladha...and a happy new year...
throw away all the unhappiness that had been in the way in 2006 and welcome a brand new chapter of 2007 where new resolutions are made and it smell a whole brand new more of ups and downs..but it aint gonna stop me from making a hatchet in the year...sad to say that 2006 was gone just like that and the only fact that i didnt bloggie in in the last moments of 2006 and its all cause i was busy with the aidiladha preparations...
well aidiladha for me was stupendiously awesome..with me following the parents balik kampung, with the fact that i had never want to go back down all the way to Muar..asmall part of malaysia..but it was really an eye-opener for me...with lots to see..well went over there in the Uncle's car and we set off after sholat aidiladha and reached there like about near to noon...wanna know something..i actually saw first hand observation of the banjir ...and to my horror it was really up to chest level when the water rise..it suddenly saddens me in the car to see the actual situation of these people as i saw the smiles on their face as they welcome the aidiladha with open hearts despite the malapetaka...but thank God that all is well soon...niwae upon reaching there, i was hoping that i would be able and just in time to see the sembelih..but i was a step later..all was done and it was apity that i didnt see...having to accept the fact that i came all the way too see it and it was all over, i was kinda sad but hehe guess God answered my prayers..so my Cik Hurai brought me to the ladang lembu to see more of the sacrifice which was really a heart-warming and heart-wrenching to see the lembu's (cow) to cry and too them accepting the God's will of being the sacrifice....well here are some pictures that i managed to pluck my courage to see the whole process doing on.. 
here the cow is being position in the lying position to be ready to be prayed on
the sacrifice is being cleaned for the owners to bring in back to dsitribute to needy people
the leftovers...sorry for the gruesome atmosphere...
well..these are some of the pictures that i had wanted to share to the peeps out there..but the purpose of showing these pics are not to make you stop eating the meat but to see what aidiladha really means and that we should be appreciative of our life..for all the wellness and good that we have i our little Singapore...
having to be there to observe all that is happening, i now truly am truly glad for a healthy life that i have and everything...well after having to go for the observation, we then headed back and then things were as per usual..eating and more eating of the ketupats, lemang, lepat and ......hehe these scrumptious delicacies can only be found during these times only..apa lagi bedallah all the foods that was spread on the table..hehe but as usual for me will only be just asmall serving..cant let all those jogging efforts go down the drain...well anyway since all is done and eating is done, soon it was time to go home back to Singapore..cause i was not feeling well, we didnt stop at any place to shop for alil while...
and by the time we reached Singapore, it was already 2007 and the new year has come in and upon reaching home, i showered and straightaway ate my medication and head off to bed...i didnt even have the time to go around messaging all my frens especially D'TJs to wish well wishes for the new year..i was seriuosly sick and so am i today but i have to get up off bed to fight off the weakness in me...
since i didnt have the time to messaged my frens yesterday, so here i am extending my well wishes for the new year to all who know me..and that wherever and whatever you have done for me in the year 2006, thanks alot and it has been great to have you around in my little life...especially to 2 of my best budds, uh'een and yaty...you have been a great buddy for me in 2006 and i am sure there are many years to come...hmm at the least till we grow old aites??....hehe and most importantly not forgetting someone close to my heart...
to my dearest and one and only hubby..happy new year to you and that i wanna thank you for being in my life now and that for being there for me always..and its joyous to me to have you in my life not only in 2006 but for many2 years that is coming till you know what...hehe..and that i am loving you more and more than the days that has passed..and that i am thinking and waiting and missing you badly in Singapore..and what did i tell you..these week is going to move slow...it has already started and moving real slow..lovie lovie you lots lots hubby..muackiez..huggss...
hahas...i never thought these two goldfishes would actually fill my life with colours when the hubby first bought it for me...i was like in my mind, hubby could have bought me something else to make me remind me of hubby whenever i misses him...but now i am like really stuck to these two precious of mine...it would be them that i look to when i first wake up in the morning...it really have a sentimental values to me...feeding it...talking to it...changing the water tank..i dont and never will find it a hassle doing it but infact i enjoyed doing it...you can say its reverse therapy also lah...by having the two precious around, at least i dont feel so empty in me cause its something that hubby left for me just before he went off to being 1138km away from me again...